Dear Ellie:

I met this guy last year in a college class at TSU in Nashville. He is very nice to me, we like one another, and I would like to see where all this goes. He has one flaw, and it’s a biggie. He is allergic to cats, and I have a cat that I adore that has been with me for more than 10 years. He has not asked me to get rid of my cat, but I feel I should do something. What to do.

- Cat Allergies and Love

Dear Cat Allergies and Love:

I was going to write a one liner that read something along the lines of tossing the boyfriend and keeping your fur baby, but my husband told me not to be mean and to be more helpful. Sorry.

I am assuming that during the “get to know one another” phase of dating that the boyfriend must have become aware that you have a cat, and you both continued. So, he must be prepared for allergic reactions and the subsequent difficulties. There are different stages of allergies, ranging from being inconvenient to being hospitalized. Hopefully, he is on the far left of the spectrum.

My advice is see where the relationship goes before you dump him or your cat.

If you are not engaged to be married or want to move in with one another, take it easy, and continue to get to know one another. Hang out at his place. Keep clothing in a separate place that you wear when out with the boyfriend, so there is not a contamination.

If you can, remove all carpet from the home, and clean often. If you keep throw rungs, wash often. Try a HEPA filter. Buy wood and leather furniture, no upholstery. Keep kitty out of your bedroom. Allergy shots may work for him, or Benadryl types of medication prior to visiting. Your kitty means a great deal to you, and so does your boyfriend, but don't to anything severe unless you have exhausted all avenues. 

If your relationship progresses, you may need to rehome your fur baby, because I would image you will want to live in the same home as your man. Just remember that kit cat has been with you more than 10 years, and you love one another. Find a good home that understands your kitty's needs, such as a very dear friend or loving family member that you don't visit too often as a couple because the allergy issue is still present. This way you can visit your cat from time to time. If you do not have a friend or family member please consider a good, reliable, and respected rescue. 

- Ellie 

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